Managing Blessings: The Surbers

by Leah Dummel

“We Can Do Hard Things”.

I read the previous statement on a blog that I regularly follow a few years ago. It is so simple, yet so profound. This declarative sentence has become a staple in our house, in our ministry, with our children, and with our marriage.

Life is hard, but we can do hard things.

I almost view it as a prophesy over our family because it is inevitable that life with throw some really hard things at us. Sometimes the hard thing may be surviving the bedtime tantrums from our 2 year old, or surviving the attitude our 5 year old brings home from Kindergarten. But in the future it may be surviving some sort of family trauma, or job loss, or death of a close friend or parent.

We don’t know what life will bring, but living in an attitude of confidence that we can do hard things alongside the God of the Universe can bring some comfort knowing those hard circumstances will come eventually.

This month on the blog we are featuring stories, hard stories, of some of our own. We are talking about HARD things members of our church family have been through in their lives and how their faith and friendship with God helped them find the blessings along the way.

This post features Jared and Chrissy Surber whose adoption journey surrounding their son, Hudson, had many bumps and difficulties along the way:

Q: For those who may not know, can you briefly share what your family went through?

Chrissy and I had tried for 9 years to get pregnant. In March of 2009 we decided to give it to God and for us to get out of the way.  A few years later we started attending classes to be foster parents. We were almost through the classes when God called us to adopt a little boy in China who has eye cancer. We accepted the call in May of 2013 and picked our son up in China in January of 2015.


Q:  What were some of your greatest fears at the time?

At the beginning, we were scared about having enough money to adopt. We knew we were doing what God wanted but wasn't sure where the funds would come from.

Another fear was for the health of this little boy. Cancer is scary. His eye was removed after we accepted the call to adopt him while he was still in China and that was hard. Was he ok?  Is he getting loved on? He was already our son but we couldn't be there for him. 

Chrissy and I had been married for thirteen years so it had just us for so long; we were fearful of how life would change and if we could adapt to a 3rd person in the mix.



Q:  What were your biggest prayers?

At first it was all about raising funds. Our faith was strong but it's tough to give God a 26,000 dollar bill. But we prayed and he always provided bigger than expected each time money was due. 

We constantly prayed for Hudson's health. We knew his infected eye was removed but didn't know if he was cancer free until he came home and had further testing. 

We prayed for strength. The paperwork was overwhelming and never-ending. There were days we wanted to quit because all the paperwork. We would get some done and turn it in and take deep breath then bam!!  More paperwork. We would pray for God to help us do one paper at a time and not look at the whole stack or the whole agenda.  We just took it one step at a time.

Q:  They say hindsight is 20/20 - looking back where do you see that God was working during this difficult time?

God truly can move mountains. If He can give us this little boy and get us through all that then he can do anything just like He says. All the little things seem so small now and we are so quick to ask God for help because we saw what He did.
 

There were so many God moments when we would feel the Holy Spirit and it would always seem to happen right when we needed it most.


Q:  If there is something you could say to anyone going through a similar situation, what would you want them to know?

If it's God's will...it's God's bill!

Give it to God. Like really lay it at His feet. Give it to Him. 

Constantly pray for His hand - for Him to help you during the tough days and make sure to praise Him on the good days. 

Take baby steps. You can't look or worry at the whole agenda. Look at one thing at a time. Knock it out. Share some high-fives. And move to the next one.   Make sure you celebrate the small wins. 

What a powerful story of God’s grace and providence during an extremely challenging time

2 Corinthians 12:9 says, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.”

You see, we can’t do hard things alone. We have to call upon the God of the Universe to lead, guide, protect, comfort, heal, and provide along the way. And when we do, He provides so much more. And those are the blessings.

Sometimes the blessings are the people who bring the meals, the friends who do your laundry while you cry, or the cards in the mail with the encouraging words.  The blessings are the new relationships you form with people who have faced or are facing the same challenges as you. And the blessing list goes on and on, if we just keep looking.