This past week, I had plans to be out of the office
for a couple of days. So I made
preparations. I was intentional about
working ahead and communicating all that needed to be done while I was
gone. Before I left, I made sure to spend
some extra time with my kids and my wife.
Everything was ready and in place and I was prepared to be gone, but
before I was able to get on the road and get out of dodge, something unexpected
happened.
I received a gift.
I didn’t know that it was going to happen; I didn’t
plan on getting a gift. But there it was
anyway sitting on my desk waiting for me to open.
But this gift wasn’t just any gift … this gift came
with instructions. This gift had
multiple envelopes and multiple parcels and each piece was to be opened at a
specific time while I was away. And the
most impressive thing was that this gift was just for me.
I have to be honest this gift was amazing, but it
wasn’t anything over the top exciting.
From someone else’s point of view some snacks and toys wouldn’t mean
much; but for me this gift meant a great deal.
This gift was given with thought and love and
care. It encouraged me and it nourished
me. It reminded me of the impact I’ve
had and it spoke truth into my life. In
the end it affirmed me and appreciated me and it gave me value.
This month we are focusing on the key areas in Gary
Chapman’s book, Five Love Languages. And
it shouldn’t be a surprise that receiving gifts is one way that many people experience
and feel love. Gifts given (no matter
their monetary value) remind us that we are worth something, and that we each
have value in the eyes of someone else.
In regards to our children, we often can forget the
impact that a thoughtful or timely gift could have. We assume children know we love them by
putting a roof over their head, clothes on their bodies, and food in their
bellies. But there are times when each
of our children will need to feel appreciated, and will need to know how much
they are valued.
What we are not talking about is buying them
everything they’ve ever wanted because they think you aren’t paying enough
attention to them. We suggest focusing
on giving gifts that mean something on a deeper level.
If the gift took you time to make, consider, plan or
prepare – then it probably will make an impact.
If the gift is specific to them, their tastes, their quirks and their
interests; it can be something that they look back on fondly and remember how
much you care and how much you love them.
This kind of giving isn’t just good for the one
receiving the gifts; it’s also good for the one giving the gifts. It allows you as the gift giver to focus
attention on something far more valuable then what often steals your time. It allows you to connect on a deeper level
and form a bond that can help you navigate the ups and downs of everyday live
together. And it helps you, the parent,
model and teach what it looks like to be thoughtful and compassionate. It teaches your children that not all gifts
cost money and that sometimes the most valuable thing you can give is your
support, your love and your affirmation.
Your child’s main love language may not be
“receiving gifts” but we have never met
any child who doesn’t like getting presents.
So our challenge to you this week is to think of ways that you can give
some creative gifts – remind your children how important they are and how much
you love them. Help them discover the
value they have not just in your eyes, but in their heavenly Father’s eyes as
well.
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