Sunday, April 10, 2016

Value: Receving Gifts

by Devin Dummel

This past week, I had plans to be out of the office for a couple of days.  So I made preparations.  I was intentional about working ahead and communicating all that needed to be done while I was gone.  Before I left, I made sure to spend some extra time with my kids and my wife.  Everything was ready and in place and I was prepared to be gone, but before I was able to get on the road and get out of dodge, something unexpected happened.

I received a gift. 

I didn’t know that it was going to happen; I didn’t plan on getting a gift.  But there it was anyway sitting on my desk waiting for me to open. 

But this gift wasn’t just any gift … this gift came with instructions.  This gift had multiple envelopes and multiple parcels and each piece was to be opened at a specific time while I was away.  And the most impressive thing was that this gift was just for me.

I have to be honest this gift was amazing, but it wasn’t anything over the top exciting.  From someone else’s point of view some snacks and toys wouldn’t mean much; but for me this gift meant a great deal.

This gift was given with thought and love and care.  It encouraged me and it nourished me.  It reminded me of the impact I’ve had and it spoke truth into my life.  In the end it affirmed me and appreciated me and it gave me value.

This month we are focusing on the key areas in Gary Chapman’s book, Five Love Languages.  And it shouldn’t be a surprise that receiving gifts is one way that many people experience and feel love.  Gifts given (no matter their monetary value) remind us that we are worth something, and that we each have value in the eyes of someone else.

In regards to our children, we often can forget the impact that a thoughtful or timely gift could have.  We assume children know we love them by putting a roof over their head, clothes on their bodies, and food in their bellies.  But there are times when each of our children will need to feel appreciated, and will need to know how much they are valued.

What we are not talking about is buying them everything they’ve ever wanted because they think you aren’t paying enough attention to them.  We suggest focusing on giving gifts that mean something on a deeper level.

If the gift took you time to make, consider, plan or prepare – then it probably will make an impact.  If the gift is specific to them, their tastes, their quirks and their interests; it can be something that they look back on fondly and remember how much you care and how much you love them.

This kind of giving isn’t just good for the one receiving the gifts; it’s also good for the one giving the gifts.  It allows you as the gift giver to focus attention on something far more valuable then what often steals your time.  It allows you to connect on a deeper level and form a bond that can help you navigate the ups and downs of everyday live together.  And it helps you, the parent, model and teach what it looks like to be thoughtful and compassionate.  It teaches your children that not all gifts cost money and that sometimes the most valuable thing you can give is your support, your love and your affirmation.

Your child’s main love language may not be “receiving gifts”  but we have never met any child who doesn’t like getting presents.  So our challenge to you this week is to think of ways that you can give some creative gifts – remind your children how important they are and how much you love them.  Help them discover the value they have not just in your eyes, but in their heavenly Father’s eyes as well.

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