Wise Parents

by Devin Dummel

I'm confident you've heard the phrase "it takes a village".   This phrase comes from an African proverb which means that it takes an entire community of different people to raise a child and help them grow in a safe environment.  From my experience, this proverb rings true.

It has been our experience that without our village our kids might not make it out alive (possibly because their parents might lose their minds).  In our "normal" routine of life, we have babysitters, grandparents, teachers, coaches and other family and friends who love on and help take care of our kids in one way or another.  Obviously, we spend the most time with our children, and my wife and I are the primary influence in their lives; but we couldn't do it without our village.

While the village is invaluable, in our culture it seems that it’s possible to try and parent on our own instead of pressing into and relying on other people to help us parent.  Our culture is one of comparison – many times silently happening over social media.  We feel insecure as parents, feeling that we should know how to handle every situation that comes our way.  Every one of us is trying our best – but many of us do not seek any outside help or instruction on how to be the best parent we can be.  But remember it takes a village.  So we must be willing to overcome the insecurities and the comparison trap.

Proverbs 27:17 says, “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.”

This proverb reminds us that God has designed us for community.  And that on our own we will become dull and useless.  That’s what happens when tools are old and used they lose their usefulness.  But in order to get them back in working order, we have to sharpen them and make them useful again.  When you think about parenting from this perspective, other parents can be great resources to sharpen the tools in your parenting toolbox.  No parent makes every right decision but when we expand the circle and allow others to sharpen us and make us better, we don’t just become better parents we become better people.

The truth is you were designed for community and you need other people.  Can you imagine how much better and simpler life would be if we let down the walls of “perfection” and “acting like we’ve got it all together” and instead allowed the community to sharpen us into the people and parents that God wants us to be?

We can be better parents when we don’t pretend that we’ve got it all figured out.  We can be wise parents who know that it takes a village to help us lead our children on the path toward God’s best future for them.