This past weekend my son, who is six-years-old played in his second basketball game. As you might imagine it was a mess, not only for my son but for every child on his team who has no clue what they are doing. Being “good parents” (whatever that means) his mother and I kept giving him instructions, trying to help him throughout the game.
We were watching every movement. “Get that rebound”, “Pass it” and “Quit messing with your socks” were phrases that we shouted over and over during the game. Our advice seemed to be of little use to him. As he played I kept watching him and something else began to stand out. As the game progressed my son kept checking the scoreboard. Over and over again he would turn around and stare at the digital scoreboard almost as if his very life depended on it.
When he realized how bad things were getting – how badly they were getting beaten; he dropped his head and started to pout. After the game was over I asked him why he was so upset and he told me that every time he looked at the scoreboard they were losing.
As a parent, I wanted to use that moment to teach him that the scoreboard isn't the only thing that matters, but I was confronted by the reality that often I measure my value and my worth and allow my feelings to be swayed by the scoreboard of life.
My guess is that if you are at all like my wife and I you regularly question if you are doing a good job as a parent. Maybe you've never said it out loud, but I think the fear of failing as a parent is something we all share.
We all wonder if we are doing what it takes to help them succeed. We keep our kids involved in everything. Trying to make sure they have every opportunity to achieve educationally, athletically and socially. Often at the end of the day, we are tired and exhausted and left wondering if it's all worth it. Are we really helping them and giving them the best life there is to offer? We are constantly looking at the scoreboard, trying not to be discouraged.
What if while watching the scoreboard we were missing the more important things in life? What if while we were checking the score we missed out on the best way to parent? Jesus said, "What good is it for someone to gain the whole world and yet lose their soul" (Matthew 16:26). What if in trying to give our kids everything we actually lost the only thing that really matters?
There are a lot of important things in life but the most important thing is a saving relationship with Jesus. When it’s all said and done – that’s the thing that matters the most. You may or may not be able to afford everything you ever wanted to give your children. But what you can do is help them discover a relationship with Jesus.
You don't have to be a perfect parent. You don't have to always check the scoreboard. You and I need to realize that when we demonstrate how to have a relationship with Jesus, that's the best thing, we could do as parents. When we live out our faith – openly and honestly with our children – it will never matter what the parenting scoreboard says – we will have won because our children will have seen what it looks like to seek after God with all of our heart, soul, and strength. There is nothing more valuable and worth your time than to model what it looks like to pursue a relationship with Christ.
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