Parenting Fears: Fear of Missing Out

by Desi Ash

Smartphones. While people might complain that they have made us into zombies there is a benefit of smartphones. We are able to stay connected and not miss out on the life not only of our friends and family but we are able to document life as it happens around us.

 The smartphone has taken place of the camera, the video camera, and even the baby book. Our memories are kept on a single device that when said device messes up and our memories are lost it is earth shattering and we will do whatever it takes to get those moments back.

Smartphones and a long list of many others things though can cause us to miss out on life happening around us. We can get sucked into the life of strangers or the unending work emails or the new movies being released on Netflix that we miss the simple moments of seeing kids light up when they see you or being able to teach them something new or even just having an extended conversation, because they truly enjoy talking to you.

When I moved from Ohio to Indiana one of my biggest fears was missing out on the life of three boys that had become my little brothers. I wanted to see them on a regular basis, attend sporting events, and be their big sister. I feared that by missing out I would lose my assigned title as their sister. While our relationship changed, the last four years have proven to me that my fear was irrational. I have had to become more intentional about being involved in their lives and each time I see them, I get the same awesome welcome of hearing my name shouted, feet pounding through the house, and big hugs.

Those same feelings were stirred when as a mom discussed the fear she was having adjusting to her oldest being in high school and how she didn’t want to miss out on anything because she realized soon he will be graduating from high school and starting the next chapter of his life. It can be easy to feel that because you are a working mom or a traveling dad or juggling kids with different sports schedules that you are missing out on the life of your kids. Remember, that feelings, while they are hard, are just feelings. Fear is just a feeling, it’s not reality.

The disciples feared that children were going to be in Jesus’ way. Instead the reality was that Jesus wanted to see the children. He even compared Heaven to them: “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” (Matthew 19:14)

Instead of the irrational feeling of missing out, think of all the ways you get to be.

·        You get to be the one who comforts your kids when their feelings are hurt.

·        You get to be the one who runs your kids anywhere and everywhere they need to go.

·        You get to be the one who shows them true love and forgiveness.

·        You get to be the who to hold your kids close and love them, no matter how old your kids get

We want to help you be intentional with your kids and not feel the fear that you are missing out. Every year we realize parent resources. These are simple tools that engage the whole family by being together. 

We currently have the Fall Family Bucket List (pdf can be found here: http://docs.wixstatic.com/ugd/21b341_bb398892d80f4d3ebea221c28d0918d8.pdf) and our next one will be our Advent boxes released the beginning of December.